Moving into Present Tense

I’ve never been one for New Year resolutions.  Not that I don’t have a million and one issues that need to be worked on, but I’m basically lazy and quite frankly, honest enough with myself to know that any significant resolution isn’t happening.  I’ve grown attached to my bad habits and acquiring better ones is way too much work.  I love carbs, wine and more wine.  I’m disorganized by my husband’s standards.  But I truly believe that creating piles on the floor around my desk is a legitimate system.  No organization resolutions this year.  As for my procrastination issues, I’ll get to those later.

2016

I think there are two types of people.  People that live in the future and people, like me, who dwell in the past.  What are you?  My husband is a definite future dweller.  Most of his sentences begin with the words, “We should.”  My sentences tend to begin with “remember when.”  Unfortunately, I’m not a happy memory dweller.  The world inside my head tends to be pretty bleak.  Many of the people I love the most only exist in the past and to visit them, I have to travel back in time. In my mind’s eye, I can see them, hear them, and forget my real eyes will never see them.

This is my resolution; I’m going spend most of 2016 living in the present and thinking about the future.  Don’t misunderstand, I’m not letting go of the people I loved, but it’s time for me to move into present tense.  I’m going to force myself to stop feeling guilty for being here and stop obsessing over death.   I’m, as the saying goes, going to play the hand I’ve been dealt—life.

So 2016, I’m here and plan on remaining present.  I pray you bring good things.

P.S.  There are a few exceptions, I’m not giving up 80’s music or indulging in oohing and aweing over my kid’s baby pictures.

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